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Didn't pack any clothes, didn't leave a note. Guess that's why I can't talk to him: I have no answers. But we survive and do what we have to do.One day I came home from work a little early and when I entered the house, heard someone running in the upstairs hallway and then a door slammed. I went up the stairs and saw his door closed, but that was normal. Walked into my bedroom and saw a dresser drawer open. It was her side of the bureau and the space where she kept her underwear and stockings and stuff. Odd. I had been meaning to bag all of her clothing and donate/trash it, but hadn't taken the time yet. So all of her lingerie, 'special' outfits meant to entice me (or someone else), and even 'marital aids' were still where she'd left them. I shrugged it off, pushed the drawer in, yelled "I'm home" and went back down the stairs to fix dinner.After sa sumptuous meal which was comprised of a package of this boiled, a can of that heated, and minimal conversation, I told him to. On this particular walk I was walking faster and payingmuch less attention to where I was going than ever before.My body was in the hills briskly walking, but my mind wasback with Millie wondering what went wrong.Millie is a wonderful person. She is bright and cheerful,with a pretty face and a very attractive figure. Eager toplease and extremely feminine she was easy to like andbecame fast friends with most people she met.And friends we were, and also lovers too, for years. Yearsand years. Last Sunday she burst into tears, told me shewas tired of waiting for me to propose to her and that eventhough it broke her heart she never wanted to see me again.With tears in her eyes, she ran out of my house and droveoff.I stood there dumbfounded. I loved her, but wasn't "inlove" with her. As close as we were, as intimate as wewere, I could never seem to find that final spark. I feltas if I was playing a role. And even worse, I felt as if Iwas miscast. In the wrong role. As right as.
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