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.. whenever]These are the tales of the Starship Futchia and her crew. They have been together on more unfortunate adventures than most in the star sector. They have traveled across more space than many meteors and they have fucked/been fucked by more aliens races than many can count. They are simultaneously the best and worst the Milkyway has to offer the universe. They are the S.S Futchia.These stories start when our young, plucky and vivacious Starship Captain Tirex stole a light purple party ship from her home planet and took to the stars. While there she threw many parties and made great use of her races partial selective hermaphroditism, which allows her to swap between female and male genitalia at will. This has no doubt brought her many great enemies and allies in her travels amongst the stars. The intense sexual nature of Captain Tirex leads to her having to flee the Andromeda galaxy for some time, angering off influential husbands she pissed off by secretly cuckolding them.. “Maizie, here! No personal sniffing.” Maizie came scrabbling around the corner of my desk with all four feet skidding to gain purchase on the hardwood floor. She leaped up into my lap and began licking my ear.“I can see it’s a dog, but what is it?”“She’s a mix,” I said. Then I went ahead, “A Pit Bull and Dachsund mix.” I could see the wheels start turning.“Which was... ?” she started. “Never mind,” she finished, shaking her head. She started again. “I need your help. Not some other detective. It has to be you. Please treat me as you would any client.”Any client? Not likely. This woman was one of Seattle’s most prominent women. Her picture was in the paper at least once a month shaking hands with the mayor, the governor, or the president of a major corporation. Rumor had it that she had a finger or some other body part in any arts, politics, or business plan in the city. There weren’t many reasons I could think of for her to want me on an investigation, and those I could think of.
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