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.. why?Why is it that when someone tells you that there are one billion stars in the universe you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint you have to touch it to check?Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?Whose cruel idea was it to put an "s" in the word "lisp"?If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? {Good question!!}Why is it that, no matter what color bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white?Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?Why do people run over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it and then put it down to give the vacuum just one more chance?How do those dead bugs get into the enclosed light fixtures?Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch. "Your BP (blood pressure) is up a bit, as I would expect with someone of your age just being told they're pregnant. I'll see you in a couple of weeks; make an appointment out front with Francine."When she told me, her nerves were as tight as a drum, almost humming. I replied, "I thought it might be something like that. I thought if we practiced enough, we eventually had to get it right. Congratulations dear, and it's about time. Does that mean we can stop doing all that icky stuff all the time which makes you scream, and that wrecks bulldog clips?"Gae punched me in the arm which is her way of telling me she loves me. "No fuckin' fear! I need double the dosage of testosterone inserted to make sure we get a boy. There are enough women around this house, distracting you." Oh, woe is me, alack and alas, the life of a working man is never done. Stop laughing wench, this is serious, I'm feeling crook because I'm going to be a father; this morning sickness is the pits. It's okay for you,.
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