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. a... sur... prise!" she said in that annoying, slow, emphasized tone she always used when her daughter had to be told something twice. This time, howver, she punctuated it with a giggle. Finally, Eleni gave up and went to her room to do some reading. She had a paper due for psych on Wednesday."Eleni," her mom called out. "It's 4:00--you'd better dress for dinner."Dress for dinner? She must have a date."How formal exactly is this?" she asked, emerging from her bedroom."Oh, it's not formal not formal at all! I just want you to look your best!" OK, mama. Who is he?"Her mother blushed deeply."It's a surprise," she reminded her in a tone like she was twelve.Eleni shook her head at her mother's silliness."Fine, if that's the way you want it. I'll go put on a dress or something." Oooo--Why don't you wear that little royal blue one?" The one I wore to prom?" Yes! Definitely! You look so sexy in that one!"Sexy? Why would her mom want her to look sexy for her new boyfriend? Unless... it. " You say as you stare into the horizon. Your eyes focus as the sun slowly rises into the morning sky, bathing you all in a golden glow of light. "And for that one thing, I am prepared to sacrifice everything I have..." Adventure?" Your younger brother asks."Pussy, my naive sibling. I shall wander the land in search of pussy. From the forests full of slender elf maidens, to the beds of seductive succubi and ponds of mermaids with the thickest hips you could imagine boy." Mermaids don't have a pussy. Their bottom halves are fish." Your brother points out."They have mouths!" You scream at him. "and breasts you could squeeze together should the need arise." Why can't you just meet a nice girl here?" Your sister pleads." They've all turned me down already-and that's not the point! I've no interest in simple farm girls when a world of possibilities awaits me!"After a bit more back and forth with your family, you finally set off on the small dirt road to the city. You ride your trusty.
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